Having the wrong mind set.

I'm reading the book Crazy Love by Francis Chan. Which everyone needs to read. It is simple but what he says is something everyone needs to hear and really challenges you and your way of thinking.
He talks about in one chapter left overs and how we don't put importance on the things that matter. We get so caught up in worldly issues and worldly "stuff" we lose sight and don't even know what we really should consider important when we claim we follow Christ with our whole heart. There is one quote about failure that really hit me hard. If you were to ask me one of the biggest fears of my life I would probably say failing and now being good enough. I don't really know how that developed in my life or why I'm that way, but I always have been. I just have always wanted to be good at everything I do and don't want to do something if I can't be good at it. Obviously...this isn't the way God intended us to live. God says, "His power is made perfect in our weaknesses". So my prayer for the last year or so is that I would remember this truth and not be afraid about "not being good enough", it isn't the right mind set.

But the quote in this book I think applies to so many people and especially me,
"Our greatest fear as individuals and as a church should not be of failure but of succeeding at things in life that don't really matter."

When I read this it kinda rocked my world. I thought of all the wasted time and energy I've spent on my fear of failure and wanting to be good at all this stuff. What if instead of those fears and worries I would have been thinking about succeeding at what God has called me to and furthering his kingdom. I look at my life and see that I have succeeded at many things that don't matter.

Not gonna lie...one of my first thoughts when I read this was man...i'm a failure at following Christ. I guess old habits are hard to break. But my prayer is that I would lose sight of my fear of failure and being good enough and only think about the things that matter in this world and being Christ to those around me. My fear should be that I'll be succeeding at things that don't really matter and have no impact on God's Kingdom.

Wait on Me...

"Wait on Me. My timing is always perfect. I know you're anxious about many things and I see your passion for all the plans I have put in your heart. I know that you long to fly, and I see your enthusiasm. However, just as a vinedresser nurtures the vine and waits patiently for the right moment to harvest the grapes, so too am I working tirelessly to prepare you to bear much fruit. Don't run ahead of Me or try to fly before My plans are complete. Your strength will fail you, and your dreams will wither away. Trust Me that My dreams for you are far greater than you can dream on your own. You will run farther and soar higher if you will patiently wait for the season of My blessing. Draw close to Me now, and I promise that this season of waiting will bring you the sweetest of rewards."

Love,
Your King and Lord of perfect timings


Isaiah 40:31

Check out Jake's blog...

http://delvingalittledeeper.blogspot.com/

So I know I'm a little biased in thinking that I have a the coolest, most intelligent brother...but it is true. He continually seeks out truth daily and he is always teaching me things and helping me learn and figure out the issues of this world. His latest blog is especially good and talks about his thoughts after hearing Shane Claiborne. Check it out. :)

More...

There is always more.
Always more of God to love, always more of yourself to lay at His feet.
Always more to learn.
Always another way to praise Him. Always deeper understanding.
My prayer for you is that you never "master" being a follower of Jesus.
May you always have a soft heart, ready to be molded by Him.
May you always have something new to surrender to His loving care.
May you find yourself knowing Jesus more every new day.
May you be amazed as you become a more clear reflection of Him daily.
May your love for the Almighty God grow with each passing moment.
May you be dissatisfied with "the way things are" and seek change.
May you always seek more of Him.
May you live in the awareness that there is more..more than we can see, more than we can know, more than we can experience this side of heaven.

I found this again today and I was reminded of how good of a prayer it is and that it needs to be my prayer for myself and for others. I want these things to be true in my life. It is just such a good description of what I want my life to be and what I need to stay focused on in my life. I want to know Jesus more every day, I want to become a more clear reflection of Him daily, I want my love for Him to grow, all of thees things are what I want. So if you can be in prayer with me in this I would appreciate it! :)

Not sure how to say it...

I don't know how to explain what I'm feeling. I'm angry and feel helpless. I don't think I've cried this much in my life. Sometimes I feel so overwhelmed by the problems of this world that I don't know what to do or how to function. How can I live in my perfect comfortable American world when there is so much out there that isn't right?

Some days...I can't eat and I get consumed by the thoughts of those out there that don't have anything. I question in these times. Not that God isn't there and that it's his fault, but why we as a church haven't rose to the occasion and found a solution to help these people suffering, not only around the world but in our own neighborhoods. I know my ways aren't God's ways and he does have a plan. That's where I find hope and peace. Knowing that I serve a God whose heart breaks at the pain and suffering of this world. We serve a God that loves us and never leaves us. He is in the middle of the pain and suffering and cries with us.

But I don't know what to do...I don't have the words to say...I feel helpless...and I question...but God is good and it's in him I must put my trust. All I can do is my part in being part of the solution and praying for a solution. I pray that I wouldn't lose this "holy discontent". I don't ever want to become comfortable with what I have and the standards that the world gives us. I will change and help with a solution because that's all I can do. I pray that God would use my life not only to glorify him in all that I do, but to use me as his hands and feet to reach the unreachables and touch the untouchables so that they may know Jesus. I pray that he would ignite the passion in others and in His church so that social injustice won't happen any longer and that people would feel the freedom that comes with following Jesus.

When will this happen? I don't know...what can I do? Sometimes I feel like I'm stuck. I want so bad to hop on a plane back to Zambia...I miss it so bad it hurts. But I'm growing where I'm planted. I'm working on being Jesus' hands and feet where I'm at. I'm allowing God to shape me and stretch me through the turmoil and pain that I go through so that I may serve Him better. I don't want to forget or run away from the ugliness of our world because that's the easy thing for me to do but instead bring something beautiful to it...

The Power of Prayer

I have really been learning about the power of prayer. It seems like it should be so basic and something everyone just knows but I don't think I've ever truly believed or realized the power of prayer. God has been teaching me this starting this summer and continually every day. One verse we referred to often this summer was in Ephesians and talks about how God can do immeasurable more than we ask or imagine and the verse that talks about how nothing is impossible with God. Do we really believe that and do we pray like we believe it? Those are things that I knew but never prayed like I did. But now I do. There are so many people in my life that I pray for. Even if they think they need it or not or even if they know I do or not...it doesn't matter, because God hears me and he's always working. There are still certain friends and people that my heart breaks for and that I've been praying for for years, but a new urgency has come because I now truly throughout my core believe that prayer is powerful and that God can do immeasurable more than we ask or imagine and that I need to pray continually. So even if I think its impossible...it's not for God.
Just a few people that I love and pray for...

He knows the plans...

It's so easy to become impatient. Not only in my own life but hearing others talk about theirs and wanting an answer to come to them also. Sometimes I don't understand why things happen the way they do, but I am learning to trust in God's timing and plans. He knows the plans he has for me and my life and I need to find rest in that fact.

I know God knows where my life is going and that is so freeing to me. The God of the universe has a plan for ME, wow. When I read things in the Bible about how we're precious in His sight and how he loves us and will never leave us, sometimes I can't believe that the creator of the world and Savior of the Universe finds me precious. It blows my mind sometimes and I'm amazed at God's grace.

I'm so glad I serve a patient and understanding God. I've struggled with being in school after this summer and wanting to just drop out and move to Africa to serve in the mission field. Not a day goes by that I don't remember and see the smiles of those little kids or the tears of the overwhelmed mothers or hear the overpowering sound of their songs in church. But I know I'm here at school for a reason and there is a season in your life for everything. Going to Zambia changed me and just reaffirmed my call and passion to serve those that are in need and need to know they have a Savior that loves them and calls them His children.

So sometimes I get impatient and do want to just drop out and move to Zambia, but I'm here. As my mom tells me, I need to grow where I have been planted. :) And that's what I wake up every morning reminding myself to do. I am in Nashville not Zambia, but there are still countless ways I can be serve, whether its at Baby Girl's Club, Room In the Inn, hanging out with girls on my floor, or loving those around me, God can and will use me where I'm at and that's something I can't lose sight of.

Praise God that he is patient with me and listens to my crazy ideas and dreams I have for my life. Praise God that he reminds me daily of ways I can love on others around me. Praise God for giving me life and giving me the opportunities that I have to serve. Praise God that he knows the plans he has for me and there's no need for me to be anxious.